This One For You, R.

Hi there, dear best friend of mine! Welcome to my kingdom!

First, I want to apologize if this place is too public for you and I write those things about you. But really, this blog is kinda of my world. I don't think there's people out there who actually read my thing. Or maybe there is, if the post is posted for a competition's sake. Also, since the first time I made this blog, I intended it for me and from me. I don't really mind if there's no one out there who read this page. But the thing is, you have to read this post. --Okay, seriously. Why do I have to describe about this blog to you? Ha ha, idk man, but keep reading, btw :p

It's okay if I call you "R" in here, right? Well, I kinda feel like I'm mentioning that one zombie whom fell in love then he returned into a human.... *long pause*







Nah, man, R's really fine, right? Cause if I mention your name in here, I believe that I have to ask your permission firstly. First time I wrote this is on October 16th. But today, October 29th, I edited this writing.



R, I knew you since I was 3 or 4. I don't quite sure what ages exactly. But I knew you since my family moved to the house next to yours. I have no idea how's my world gonna be if we didn't move that day.

Well, this is embarrassing, but I have to admit that I dropped my tears after I wrote that sentence above in class by October 16th. There was no teacher so I took a note from my phone. And I promised to myself that I'll post the note in my blog as you go.

You know, R? Thank you so much for being someone in my life for like 13 years. Whoa, it's 13! I didn't recognize it at first 'til I finally wrote it. We all know it's Taylor's lucky number. I hope it'd be a luck number for both of us, too. I think, it was the best 13 years that ever happened to my life. You're younger than me but you taught me a lot.

Without you, maybe I would really suck on English. Without you maybe I'd never bake. Without you maybe I'm just a typical average teens who bitch about unnecessary things like you-know-what-I-mean... teenage-love-life. We have a same track mind, right? So I don't really need to explain everything. :p

You know, R? I might say that some people in my life is my best friend. But you're different. You are on a different level. You are way level above them in my life.

There might be some people in my life who would make me laugh. Or some people who would listen to my story. Or some people who support me upon my dreams. But really, there were no person but you, who would make me laugh, listen to my story, support me upon my dreams, doing crazy things like playing with shadows when there were no electricity, baking some cookies, hang out with me like there's no end, or even stay on their house and yet feels like mine and then stay awake until it's dawn.


Some people said that you're arrogant, you're not that nice girl as they expect you to be, sometimes. But they just didn't know who you are. I know in fact who you are. Like Anne Frank said, "We don't tell each other everything, because we always together." Because we knew what happened to both of us without even telling. So I knew you, who you truly are, and fuck what people think about you cause I respect you in my life.

R, I don't think you remember this. But I think this is how's our friendship began. Well, I don't quite remember how it is, but it's flashing memories, ya know? Like when you said about you remember how your brother scared upon A Aris. It's kinda how this is. I remember we once fought. I don't remember why we fought, but the thing is, we fought against each other. You pulled my hair and vice versa. Dede was there, trying to separate us. And she did it. I remember how's your face looks like. Full of angry. Well, people said that you were a mean child while I was the one who don't want to lose on a battle. So maybe it was the caused of our fight.

Hence, I think Dede told your mother about our fight and your mother told mine. You know what happened after that? I got lecture from both of them. My mom and yours. They said, if you fight me, I shouldn't fight back because you're younger than me. I was an innocent child who nod to what these old people said. But now I think I was silly like seriously why would I let myself to lose in a fight?! -- Ha ha, kidding. It's a relief to obey upon what they said that day. Cause if I don't, we might be hate on each other right now.

I also remember you were that little kid who loves cooking since you were a little. Remember that day when we made 'tempe goreng'? I think it was when we were 5 or 6. Well.... there was an accident when we made it.

You sat on a chair and I didn't because there was no chair left. So as you stand up to did something with the flour which there on the table, I picked your chair, and you didn't recognize it. When you about to sat back, you fell because there were no chair on your back. And you cried. You told Dede I pulled you. What a lie, in my thought. So I tried to explain what happened to them (Dede and our mom), but then I felt sorry because yes, it was my fault to make you fell. Well, this is awkward cause I feel like this is a guilty pleasure.

Well, R, so much things that happened to both of us. Like seriously, it's 13 years long, and if I write them in here. It could be a novel of our silliness.

R, you once went to America and I accompanied you to the airport that day. You know what happened in the car as I went home? I dropped my tears, and idiotically my sister shouted it like, "Si ade nangis." And how silly I am to reply it with, "Enggak da, cuman kelilipan." What a cliche answer like in a cinema. They won't believe it, I know. But heck it. It's none of people business if I cry or laugh, right?

And yesterday, maybe you saw there was some water in my eyes. Well, R, to be honest, I don't even know what the fuck were these water doing in my eyes. I... tried to hold it, but I just can't.. So I let it out as little as possible.
In car, I sat on the second row. It was your mom's request. But that's okay, really. I sat on the right side. I starred outside the window, along the way. And I didn't recognize it that there were water on my cheeks. So I wiped it. And it fell again. And again. And again.. This might be overrated, but I heard your voice from my mind in the car. And it was sounds so clear because it was so quiet. No one really knew that I cried because I made no noise.
But don't worry about me. I remembered that last night, the first tears that dropped was from the right eye. Study said that if the first tear comes from the right eye, it means a tear of happiness. But if it comes from the left eye, it means sadness. So I believe that that last night tears was a happy tears for you. R, I know that it has been your dream to go to America. Congratulation for that. You finally reached it.

Oh, btw, I stopped crying as your mom started a conversation, then we talked about nothing like city light or traffic or whatever, I don't even know what I was talking about. And then, boom, the car accident, which I told you, happened.

Well, I hope you'd comeback, not only for next year. Even if I got my dream, I planned to come here once a year, ya know?
What make me sad is, I don't know when will I meet you again except for next year. Maybe on some important events like you said. But what if there's no important events anymore?

Promise me you'd always be my best friend. People said that it's a long-last friendship if it happened for more than 7 years. Please prove me that they right. People said that friendship ends when each of person stop telling story. Promise me that you'll keep telling me about great things that may happen to your life in there. Please email me your pics with mickey mouse and those frickin' princesses at Disneyland. Tell me how awesome your class is. Tell me there were no stupid boys anymore or girls who always scream like it's their own frickin place. Tell me how beautiful winter is. Or how much degrees in your place. I can't wait to hear them.

R, as Charlie said, I hope things are really good with you.

But if something went wrong, or something bad or even worst happen, I know it will fine soon, but don't forget that I always here, ready to hear all of your story, good or bad. Yes, I'm worry that much. Just promise me to keep in touch. And keep on the line. HA! You this read wrong and you correct it with 'online'. Smile if my guess is correct. Uh, wait for it. Did you realize that I typed 'you this read wrong' instead of 'you read this wrong'? Ha ha, good luck on that, buddy XD xx


love,

oh-should-I-write-my-name?